Death Engine Protocol – Book Blitz and Giveaway

Chapter 1

Another concussive blast connected with my head, audibly fracturing my elderly skull. Suddenly, I was in the air, weightless and free. Then, just as abruptly, there was a wall—a substantial wall and a fuckton of pain. My neck crunched as it jammed up into my cranium.

I tried to laugh at my assailant and tell him his attack was as meaningless as his fucktastic life. Instead, all that came out was, “The palmetto bells watusi da da da down wub,” followed by a stream of vomit.

Great. Freaking brain damage.

The cognitive impairment itself wasn’t particularly painful; just verbally inconvenient. I gazed up at the hazy visage of RoboBash’s metallic face shield. It should have been smooth, with a mirrored finish. Instead, it warped into a lumpy mass, slowly melting from my vision until there was nothing but blackness.

Now, my pain was coming.

At first, there was nothing. Only darkness accompanied me. Then, the heavens expanded into my reality. It blossomed from a single blue-green dot into a perfect tropical seashore.

The ocean waves caressed my toes as the sun warmed my tired bones. A breeze brushed my cheek as I opened my eyes and gazed upon the flawless paradise. Yawning the clean, fresh breeze into my lungs, I sat up and enjoyed the moment’s tranquility. It had been so long.

A pang of grief struck me as my cognitive faculties started to return. I had been enjoying a perfectly clear night in my backyard, downing gummies and chugging tea when out of the fucking blue Robodouche decided to bum-rush me in my lawn chair. He not only harshed my buzz, but killed me in the process. Why now? What the hell did that twat want?

“Fuck,” I cursed. This was going to suck.

Things in my home at Champion Acres had been virtually serene, well, compared to my working days. Now it was about to become shit again.

Down the beach, a man waved at me from a distance. So familiar. I knew him but couldn’t place him. It had been so long. He grinned and waved as a halo of late-afternoon sunlight bathed his body.

“Don’t look at the light,” I reminded myself. “Never look at the light.”

But I did. I gazed upon its—his body, the light. The radiance of the blue sky contrasted with the warm, intense luminance. The fierce glow seduced my eyes. The blue faded to sapphire, then indigo, then oblivion. The man dissipated, partially absorbed by the brilliance. The rest of my tropical paradise joined the void of nothing. I tried to avert my eyes, but there was only the light. The incredible, spectacular light called to me, drawing me in, suffocating me. Tired of fighting, I let go, releasing myself to the universe’s will. So peaceful, drifting, warm. So temporary.

CRACK

The glow shattered as RoboBash’s left fist pulled back from his most recent skull-shattering blow.

“Moth…effin…light,” I groaned.

“Ha, ha!” he mocked. “Puny old crone, maybe a little overrated. Now, I will send you into the light!”

My eye twitched open momentarily, just long enough to see RoboBash flex his body, wind up his final blow, and declare victory.

“Nobody can defeat me,” he proclaimed to the cosmos.

My body seized.

Robo laughed at what he perceived to be my final death throes. He was sorely incorrect. I was done dying. Worse than that, I was healing. And there was nothing anyone could do about it.

The process was anything but pleasant. Far from it. The sensation of bone knitting, flesh regenerating, and fierce antibodies doing a perfectly choreographed dance of ‘fuck you’ to my already angry nerve endings. Then, as if that wasn’t enough, a new sensation of electro-hell compounded the agony. Millions of microscopic shocks coursed across my body.

Robo’s right fist connected with the left side of my face just as an electric field swaddled me. His mech armor’s robotic fist sprayed white-hot sparks. He yelled in surprise.

“What?”

“The light is a lie,” I panted. “It only brings you back.”

Robo snarled and examined his shorting appendage. “You were dead.”

“Oh, yeah—that.” I stood up, hearing my neck bones audibly snapping back into place as I moved. “Someone set you up, buddy. There’s only one way to kill me, and nobody has the patience.”

RoboBash shook his head. “I am not a patient man. You will die now. Again.”

“See, this is what I’m talking about,” I said, rolling my eyes in futility. “Just stop!”

Robo wound up for another frontal assault. His fist didn’t have a chance to connect before he was struck by another sphincter-loosening surge of electricity. Apparently, I had acquired electrical abilities this time, and Robo needed to eat less cabbage.

Given the tremendous pain I was in, I executed the best saunter I could. I stood over RoboBash, acrid smoke billowing from his torso. He was clearly conscious, but would not move anytime soon. I reached into my pocket and pulled out a handful of crumpled cash coins. Dropping the money at Robo’s feet, I taunted him.

“Here, buy yourself a surge protector.” I staggered away. The acrid smell of electrified flesh almost overwhelmed the fresh floral scents of paradise that still lingered in my memory and teased my senses.